How To Make Friends In Hostels Even If You’re Shy

The best friendships often start slowly and grow stronger over time. Don’t skip those school dances or community events – they’re friendship goldmines! Remember, every friendship starts with just saying “hi” to someone new.

While all humans are wired for connection, we all have our own personalities, strengths, needs, and preferences. I encourage you to test the limits of your comfort zone, but you don’t need to be someone that you’re not. As I touched on earlier, it can be easy to compare yourself to other students. While I recommend against doing this when it involves putting yourself down, it can be a valuable tool when you’re genuinely looking to make a connection. If you’re ready to put yourself out there (even just a little), here’s how to make new friends—without forcing yourself to be someone you’re not.

Above all, I firmly believe that it’s important to embrace yourself for the unique individual that you are. Maybe you’re not someone who always walks into the dining hall surrounded by people or is the life of the party at social events—and that’s okay. In fact, you may not actually want a big friend group if you’re introverted or shy. It’s possible that you’re falling into a comparison trap and feeling inadequate based on what you think you “should” want or have. Instead of thinking about where you “should” be or what you “should” do, try turning inward. Most college campuses (even if you’re at a community college) have plenty of organizations, clubs, or affinity groups.

Then, when they meet in class after that discussion, engaging in person might seem less daunting. Few things are as painful for a parent to hear from their student as “I have no friends in college.” Friends provide critical social support and make the college experience more enjoyable. As a result, a lack of friends can make this new educational setting and life stage harder to navigate, which can hinder them academically and socially, as well as harm their mental health. It’s probably not possible that everyone at your school dislikes you.

Also, pay attention to what your friend is going through, and then check in when it matters. Lasting friendship is about showing up when it counts, and also being real with each other along the way. Other good signs that someone is open to connection are laughter, eye contact, and sharing personal details. In general, friendship is typically built through mutual interest — little by little. The more you can get comfortable with who you are, the more you’ll attract like-minded people who value you for you.

You can learn to meet new people by acting friendly so that people feel comfortable approaching you. It can also help to build up your confidence around other people. After that, keep your new friends around by being positive and kind. It is easier for some people than others to have small talk with people of any age or social stature, but for some of us, it takes a lot of time, energy, and effort to approach someone new. To make it worse, television shows and films show us a world where hanging out with friends or strangers is super easy. Let’s dive in and explore some tips and tricks on making friends when you have a shy personality.

Negative body language puts people off, and they might not feel like talking to you. If this sounds familiar, take a deep breath – you’re not alone. A 2024 Pew Research study found that 43% of teens feel lonely at school sometimes. Having to make new friends might be intimidating to your child, so go over these ideas and see if she can come up with more on her own. Making online friends can also be a great practice for making friends in person.

Some of the most interesting people may seem shy at first, so give everyone a chance. Information for young people on understanding exam stress and where to go for support. They might even be waiting for someone like you to say hi first. 💙 Practice building the skill of Curiosity about those around you during this meditation with Tamara Levitt. As much as possible, I recommend against comparing yourself to others. You’re a unique individual, and it’s not fair to hold yourself to expectations that may not align with what you want, need, or are capable of.

Take Advantage Of Structured Social Moments

Hanging out with friends of friends can be a great way to meet new people. It’s always less awkward if you have someone to introduce you and something to talk about. When it comes down to it, friendship is all about connection — and that can start in small ways. Whether you strike up a conversation on the bus or flash a smile to a classmate in the library, you’re putting yourself in a position to meet future friends.

With time, patience, and a willingness to step outside of your comfort zone, you can make lasting friendships at work that can enhance your professional growth and personal satisfaction. Making new friends can seem impossible when you’re socially awkward and don’t know how to talk to people. The discomfort can make you want to avoid social situations altogether. Here are a few ways to overcome feeling socially awkward and build friendships.

Ask open-ended questions and show a genuine interest in what they have to say. Walking tours, pub crawls, yoga sessions, family dinners, and trivia nights are great low-pressure ways to meet people. Many of these are included or available for a small fee and are designed for group bonding. Check out our article on hostel activities that can help you meet new people. Hostels are one of the easiest environments to meet new people, even if you’re shy. Shared spaces, group activities, and built-in social features (like the Hostelworld app chat) help create natural opportunities to connect without pressure.

Set small, achievable goals for socializing, such as introducing yourself to one new person at a party or participating in a group activity. Gradually, you’ll start to feel more comfortable in social situations. Based on these definitions, we can conclude that it’s possible to be introverted, which is a more static personality trait than being shy or socially anxious. The key thing to remember here is that we’re not trying to get rid of your introversion; that’s what makes you so unique.

Most people are a little shy, especially when they’re in unfamiliar places or around new people, and this doesn’t have to be a barrier to making friends. Still, being extremely shy, introverted, or socially anxious can make meeting and talking to people a lot harder. If you’re a shy person, you might need to push yourself to get out more, meet people, and start conversations. If you do it enough, you are bound to make some new friends. Remember, it’s okay to be yourself, embrace vulnerability, and prioritize your well-being in navigating the social dynamics of the workplace.

While there’s no guarantee they’ll develop that sort of bond with a roommate, the situation makes trying a wise idea. Not only will roommates have ample chances to engage with each other one-on-one, but having even a casual rapport could make the year easier regardless of whether they become friends. Fortunately, college campuses of all types are brimming with students. That creates ample opportunities for students to meet others, increasing the odds they’ll encounter someone who will ultimately become their friend. By following these tips and staying open to new experiences, you can gradually overcome your shyness and establish meaningful relationships. Starting to practice active listening in everyday life is an excellent way to strengthen your communication skills and build deeper, more meaningful relationships.

Be yourself, and you’ll attract the kind of friendships that feel genuine and easy. With the Hostelworld app’s chat function, you can get in touch with other travellers staying in the same hostel or nearby before you even arrive. You’ll often find people planning excursions, chatting about restaurants or asking if anyone fancies a beer. Not only can you socialise with other visitors to the city, but you can also get to know your hostel mates before you arrive.

• Online networking events are also increasingly common at online-only schools.
• For as much as you’d like someone else to approach you first, they also would.
• Common gathering places like cafeterias, the student success center, quads, fitness centers, and similar areas are locations where students often get together informally.
• Despite being surrounded by people, forming real, meaningful connections can feel overwhelming, especially if you’re shy, introverted, or out of practice.
• The key thing to remember here is that we’re not trying to get rid of your introversion; that’s what makes you so unique.

Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither are strong relationships. Making friends in youth hostels doesn’t mean you have to be “on” 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. This will make you feel more comfortable and sociable when you are back in the common areas. Many travellers understand that they need to take time for themselves because it’s part of the rhythm of travelling. If you’re struggling to make friends in college, you’re not alone. Even though you may not hear others talking about this issue, many students experience this, and therapy can help.

When you’re trying to make friends, don’t forget to consider reconnecting with old friends you may have lost touch with. While www.thecharmerly.com/ you might feel weird about reaching out and reconnecting with someone after it’s been a while, you may be surprised at how happy they are to hear from you. If you want to improve your social skills, self-confidence, and ability to bond, take our 1-minute quiz.

Aside from that, focus on clubs, classes, teams, or volunteer positions that are longer-term, or that go for a few weeks at the very least. Shy people may feel uncomfortable being around people they aren’t familiar with. In a room full of strangers, they may remain by themselves, away from the crowd, kind of in their own world.

The key to meeting people as a shy introvert is to choose places with an environment well-suited to your quiet personality. If you try to fake having an extroverted personality, you’ll end up attracting people who are interested in the persona you’re portraying. This means you’ll have to keep up this fake persona for the duration of your friendship — otherwise, it will be really off-putting when your true self inevitably come out. It’s one thing to actively avoid an interaction every now again (which I still often do if I’m just not in the mood), but in general it’s not a good idea to make this an every day occurrence. If you need some more tips and tricks on engaging in unexpected conversations as an introverted person, check out my article How to Handle Unwanted Conversations as an Introvert.

If you have no friends and are wondering what to do, we have some insight for you. Whether you’ve moved to a new city or are looking to expand your friendship group, we created Bumble For Friends to help you … It’s so important to be genuine and authentic when trying to make new friends.

If you enjoy games, for example, the Pick Me Up Party Game can serve as a perfect icebreaker at gatherings. When you’re looking for a fun way to bond with new people, the Pick Me Up Party Game is an ideal option. This game invites players to answer humorous, fun questions, allowing you to connect with others through shared laughter. It’s a great way to ease into conversations in a relaxed, low-pressure setting.

Start Small

Email the order confirmation to SocialSelf to get your unique coupon code. If this seems too difficult, you can prepare a strategy in advance to feel more comfortable. Even though it can be a source of anxiety, accepting invitations to social events is a crucial step. In both cases, the key aspect is to be open and friendly, while remaining aware of the other person’s social signals. In a cafe, sit in a place where it’s easy to observe and join interactions, like the bar or a communal table.

You can meet up in less anxiety-inducing situations, like watching a movie together. You don’t have to force yourself to be the life of the party. If you’re in the communal kitchen, rooftop terrace, lounge or courtyard, you’ll have the opportunity to naturally start or join a conversation. Bring a book, cook a meal or just relax and someone will probably approach you at some point. Transfer students too can find it particularly difficult to make friends in college.

Making friends can feel scary sometimes, but you’re not alone! Many teens face challenges when trying to connect with others, and the good news is that these barriers can be overcome with the right strategies and mindset. Having good friends actually helps you figure out who you are and teaches you how to communicate effectively with different people. Scientists have found that teens with close friendships feel less worried and way happier than those who don’t.

This can help you connect with like-minded individuals who share your interests and values. Start by making an effort to greet your coworkers with a smile and a friendly hello each day. This simple gesture can go a long way in breaking the ice and creating a positive impression. Many hostel friendships are formed over a cosy breakfast or evening tea in the kitchen. Don’t worry if it takes time – good friends are worth waiting for! Every teenager goes through this, and you’re not alone in feeling nervous about making friends.

As a result, shier students can potentially find introverts to talk to, and it may be easier to bond since you both may have similar views on these gatherings. By attending events that align with their interests, your student can cross paths with other like-minded students. Plus, the event can be an initial topic of conversation, giving your student an easy way to engage with others. While they can look similar, being introverted is not the same as being shy. Shyness comes from emotions like nervousness or fear of being judged, while introversion is a personality trait that comes from a combination of genes and environment.

Head To Common Gathering Places

Then, they can use their newly-honed skills when they encounter students during their day. In many cases, the easiest way for your student to start making connections is to engage with other students in their classes. The class itself serves as common ground and can act as an icebreaker. Your student can ask others what they thought about the previous lesson, why they chose to attend a particular course, and similar questions to get the conversation going.

It’s also possible that you’re an introvert and get drained by social situations quicker than extroverts, which can make you feel awkward around other people. One effective way to break the ice and start building relationships with your coworkers is by engaging in small talk. This can be as simple as asking about their weekend plans, commenting on the weather, or discussing a recent company event. By showing a genuine interest in your colleagues and taking the time to get to know them on a personal level, you can start to establish a rapport that can eventually lead to friendships. Instead, other people will begin coming to you, taking some pressure off.

You don’t have to be the loudest person in the room, your mere presence is enough to open the door to new contacts. If you’re shy, introverted or just don’t know how to start a conversation with people from all over the world, don’t worry! The great thing about a youth hostel is that you can socialise there.